In the second installment in my “Words to Live By” series, I take a look at death. Again.

In the first installment, I took a look at how people die. But the how is a variable, dependent on the individual. What’s not a variable is the end result, which brings me to my point. Everybody dies. And then what? One of the most common and divisive topics regarding death is the decision to be buried or cremated. And here are my thoughts.

You have to go with cremated. It’s not a common occurrence, but people have been known to come back from the dead. Not like Walking Dead style as far as I know, but rather, people who were declared dead but got their second wind or something at their own funeral. We even talked about it on the radio show. As terrifying as it is, it’s happened. More than once. Lady wakes up in her coffin. Sees she’s at her funeral. Then dies again.

And that’s only the ones we know about. Imagine all the poor bastards that didn’t wake up until they were put in the ground already. From your perspective, you fall into a deep sleep, and possibly even experience some pleasant dreams. Maybe involving a kitten riding a unicorn on a rainbow bridge that rains candy. Then you wake up and you’re buried alive in a dark box. *shudders*

What you need to consider is worst possible outcome of both options. If you’re put in the ground, you can wake up and be buried alive. From there, you’re subjected to the worst fear imaginable while dying a slow death due to asphyxiation. On the other hand, you could wake up in a giant oven. Sucky? Yeah. Painful? I’m sure. But at least it’s over quick and you’ll have a funny story to tell whenever you get to where you’re going.

Upon being cremated, I will be disappointed that I will no longer have a corporeal form. This body of mine sucks sometimes, but I’ve grown pretty attached. Still, when weighted against the benefits of being ash, it comes up short.

Once ash, I can be spread all over the place, places that meant something to me in my life that I’d like to continue being a part of. The place where I first kissed my wife, for example. The place where I took our children on our bumpin’ family vacation. Or if I have no family and die sad and alone, I can be spread…where I got a job promotion or something. There is so much variety at your fingertips as ash. Figuratively.